At Family TLC, we’ve noticed that conflict around finances is the largest contributing factor of separation. We believe that fighting about money or avoiding money discussions predict separation and divorce more than any other relationship problems. If couples can learn to talk constructively about money issues, many relationships could be saved.
Our clients have told us that discussions about debt, budgeting, money secrets, spending, financial emergencies and investing often turn into arguments. These arguments can then turn into full blown fights with damaging and angry words. While we can all agree that this is not an effective way to communicate with your partner, many couples are unable to change the course of this dialogue once it starts.
Financial conflict in couples can lead to sleepless nights, arguments about trivial matters, sexless marriages, and built-up resentments. Over time and without constructive dialogue, divorce is often the result.
There are many wonderful professionals, services and resources available to assist couples in cleaning up their money act. However, if couples cannot communicate effectively and honestly with each other regarding their finances, no amount of professional intervention will help. The financial challenges will just get worse; this is a cyclic problem.
By the time couples come to see us Family TLC, we can see the extent of the damage that financial problems wreak on the individual and the relationship. Couples caught in these financial nightmares come to us angry, defeated or both. They often struggle with a variety of symptoms such as excess stress, weight problems, anxiety issues, substance abuse, sleep problems, unhappiness, and so much more.
The relationship erodes further with each argument or avoidance. Couples begin to dislike each other, resentment grows and they lose sight of the person they once loved. They now view that person through a tainted lens of blame and mistrust.
We’ve seen this scenario so often at Family TLC that we decided we wanted to do what we could to prevent the deterioration of relationships and stop the unnecessary stress on couples. Sue Cook of Family TLC invited Patti Smith of Money Bootcamps to collaborate on the production of The M-Spot for Couples: Achieve Financial Peace and Prosperity. This is an audio production that gets to the root of the problem: ineffective communication. If you can strengthen or repair your ability to communicate with your partner you can work together to build a positive financial reality.
As Patti taught us, it is important for couples to understand what each of their money stories is. This is very important because our unique money stories shape our behaviours and attitudes about money and affect our beliefs and ability to communicate about money.
Additionally, couples need to know what their money style is and the style of their partner. Once you gain this understanding of each other you can begin to look objectively and constructively at how your respective styles impact your ability to have constructive and positive dialogue about money. The M-Spot for Couples does exactly this and teaches couples how to have meaningful, productive money conversations and being good stewards of money.