What Emotions Are My Children Experiencing,

When Blending Families?

In second marriages a blended family includes children from one or both of first households.  Sue Cook has helped many families with blending their families.

Your child may experience the following:

1.    Left Out of your choice “Why do I have to live with those kids”?
2.    Uncertain or even Angry about the change. Your child may not know what to expect and may  not even like the change
3.    What will the new person in their life Mean to them?
4.    What will their new Step-Siblings be like?
5.    How will their Relationship with their Biological parents change?

These are all common reactions and there are strategies that will help:

1.    Be Realistic – things won’t be perfect overnight.
2.    Be Patient –kids need to time to trust and count on you.  
3.    Limit your expectations –you will probably give a lot of time, energy, love and affection that will not be returned immediately. Think of it as making small investment that may one day make a lot, but don’t expect anything in return for now.
4.    Make sure that you let the kids Adjust Gradually and give them plenty of time to make a successful transition.
5.    Blending Families can be Stressful for both parents and children. Make sure you present a unified parenting approach to the children – arguing or disagreeing in front of them may encourage them to try to come between you.
6.    Talk to a professional who is experienced in assisting blended families to come together and overcome the obstacles that each individual in the family may face

If you are blending a family and want to make it last a lifetime,

call Family TLC

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