Why Do We Have to Move?

Children and Moving – Divorce/Separation

Moving to a new community may be one of the most stress-producing experiences a family faces. Moves can be especially hard on children and are even more difficult if their parents are going through a separation or divorce.

Sue Cook of Family TLC says that your child may experience the following:

Interrupted Friendships “When am I going to see my friends again? “I miss them and I don’t have anyone here to play with”.

“Why do I have to go to a new school”? A new school and schedules may cause Anxiety and Stress.

Children in kindergarten or first grade may be particularly Vulnerable as they are just in the process of separating from their parents and adjusting to new teachers.

“Why is my teenager Protesting the move?” “Why doesn’t he want to move?”

Some youngsters may not talk about their distress, so you should be aware of the warning signs of

Does your stomach feel like it is constantly in knots?

Stress not only wears your body down physically, it also threatens your mental well being. Stressors include: moving, leaving school, getting married, having a baby, changing jobs, divorce, illness, experiencing losses. Daily Stressors include: being stuck in traffic, conflicts at work, conflicts with family members, deadlines & multiple work demands, the demands of family & work life, the fast pace of modern life.  If you need to speak with a professional contact Sue Cook of Family TLC

You may experience the following symptoms:

1.     You cannot each your lunch because your stomach feel like it is constantly in knots?
2.       Do you feel like you are coming down with the flu because your muscles feel sore and tense all the time?
3.       Friends are going out and you can’t go because you are feeling tired a lot of the time?
4.     A co-worker asks you if you are feeling okay because you appear to be on most days low and unhappy?

There are strategies that can help you.

1.     Exercise daily, 15 to 20 minutes. This can be accomplished by going for a walk, swimming, golfing, or going to the gym.
2.     Learn to relax. Practice 10 to 15 minutes twice daily. Find a location in a peaceful, quiet setting. Let go of the negatives. Develop visual imagery.
3.     Talk it over with a trained mental health professional. These professionals can help you develop strategies.

What Emotions Are My Children Experiencing,

When Blending Families?

In second marriages a blended family includes children from one or both of first households.  Sue Cook has helped many families with blending their families.

Your child may experience the following:

1.    Left Out of your choice “Why do I have to live with those kids”?
2.    Uncertain or even Angry about the change. Your child may not know what to expect and may  not even like the change
3.    What will the new person in their life Mean to them?
4.    What will their new Step-Siblings be like?
5.    How will their Relationship with their Biological parents change?
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At Family TLC we have seen thousands of clients and we know how much it helps when clients engage in movement. We are always looking for referral partners in Barrie who we are confident can help our clients.

Sue Cook  is our group leader who met with Jenn Lit of Enerjennics and was impressed by Jenn’s passion and commitment. Jenn offers a great dance program, boot camps and can even customize a program for you.

The primary focus for Enerjennics is on physical and mental well being through exercise and movement. It is their belief that when individuals partake in a positive yet challenging physical environment it helps to achieve not only physical strength and stamina but mental and emotional as well. Mental stability, creativity, feeling of accomplishment, motivation and positive outlook are some of the benefits to participating in an upbeat training program like Enerjennics.

Enerjennics Mission

• Educate and motivate to improve muscular strength, posture and flexibility - STRENGTH
• Educate and motivate to improve stamina – ENERGY
• Educate and motivate to improve confidence and self love – VITALITY

There are fitness classes and boot camps for everyone.  For more information about classes contact  Jenn Litt at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or go to www.enerjennics.com

Apart But Still Parents

What is the greatest gift you can give your child?

Being your healthy self. Why? If you are healthy you can . . . .

1. Focus on developing solutions instead of wasting your time on problems.
2. Give your children stability and consistency rather than taking them on an emotional roller coaster.
3. Respond to situations and de-escalate them instead of over-reacting and making things bigger.
4. Manage conflict between households instead of increasing the conflict your children are exposed to.
5. Help your children adjust rather than witness your children having difficulty adjusting.

Sue Cook has helped many couples through separation and divorce.  Below are some important things to remember.

DO’S

• Always think “What is in my child’s best interest?”
• Go out of your way to ensure that your ex is included in your child’s life
• Stop fighting especially if the child can hear
• Be flexible
• Reassure your child that they are loved, divorce is not their fault and neither  one of you will abandon them

• Remember your child will worry about themselves and each parent.
• Openly talk about their worries and reassure them
• Give the child permission to express their feelings freely. Model sharing appropriate feelings
• Take care of yourself so your child can be a child not a caregiver of you
• Follow through on commitments and promises
• First Discuss any proposed schedule changes directly with the other parent
• Respect the other parent’s scheduled time with children and do not schedule   plans that will conflict
• Be willing to support and encourage extended family relationships
• Create a calendar for the children so they always know their schedule